Driftwood..

You ever wonder why, certain people make impressions in your life?
Like seeing them every day just makes the day a bit more bearable.
Their smile, demeanor, basic outlook on things can turn your whole day around..
then one day they out of your life...and you feel lost. Like you're just drifting.
Drifting through life..drifting through work..
I'm tired of drifting.
I've drifted though my life, drifted through my job, my marriage
my friendships, I'm just drifting on an endless current that seems to have no
landing in sight.
Unless I put my feet down, and stand.
After forty nine years on this fucking marble, is it too late to stop drifting
through life
like the wood you find at the beach?
Hell, even that they polish up, slap on a coat of varnish and call it art.
Why can't I choose the time to look at my life and polish it up, stop the drifting and do what's in my heart..
I'm tired of watching people go..watching life pass.
While I sit on the side of the road.
I know people leave, move on, do what's right for them, and I applaud them for that
and hold not one ounce of regret...
or anger...but there is loss.
I can't help that. I feel a deep sense of loss. but I'll get over it, and I'll move on, because at the same time I'm happy for them, because they are doing what's best for themselves. As so should I.
I need to fix things in my life.
I don't know how, just that I do.
I don't want to be driftwood anymore...I want to be settled on the
the shore.