DID I MISS IT?
The 12/21/12 Event...So, was it Midnight on or Midnight at the end of ?

Hey folks, how ya doing? Long time no see. Yeah I know, I haven't been here in a really long time, but I've been busy, work, life, things like that. I can go on and on...and I won't because that's something for another time.

So lets get down to the meat and potatoes of it all. 2012, we were supposed to not be here about now, I shouldn't be writing this to you folks, but yet here I am? And if you're reading this, there you are...and we did not go BOOM! So what's up? What happened? Questions abound and I'm sure there are people out there that are still hunkered down in their bunkers, waiting to hear some sort of explosion, earthquakes, commotion, something to validate that all the hopes and worries and thousands of dollars spent were not done in vain...WELL GUESS WHAT?

THEY WERE!

NOTHING HAPPENED! WE'RE STILL HERE!


Or are we?
See, according to the experts, the calendar that everyone was so freaked out about, well it never really had anything on it about an ending...more so, it was a change to of a cycle...where it rolls over to another cycle. it just starts over again. Boy are some folks really going to feel stupid. Well, here's one last chance...just to give you a break. We will see, the countdown started at Midnight tonight and you Kmart shoppers have 24hours till 11:59 pm 12/21/12 to see what happens...We will see. Do we still have time to pack? I'm going to have a great day...Let's see how you spend the so called LAST DAY ON EARTH!!!

yeah I know, but couldn't resist..lol!

See ya in the next few hours....or not....

Been a long Time, Folks...


So how ya been , World?

Yeah, the Wolf is back..betcha thought I was dead...no? Hoping, though..lol!
nah, I'm kidding..

So, where have we gone from where we've been? I'm still with the cable company, yeah, glutton for punishment, what can I say. Still married..Still have the Monkey, Dottie Ann, and she's crazy as ever..
Oh, let me tell you what she did last night,
The wife and I were taking her for her walk, and as we were coming around the corner to our home, we came upon three stray dogs! They ranged in size from small, to a large, white German Shepard. Now, one rule I have is never go anywhere without a good, sharp knife. And I make good on this, its a mantra, a standard, but that night, I forgot it.
I would rather stick my own leg than hurt a dog, but I had more than my own safety here. I had my wife, and Dottie Ann with me, and their safety was first in my mind. So I made noise, and big gestures, and it worked on the smaller dogs, but the big dog kept moving forward.
All I had was my hands, and I was ready to use them, when all of a sudden, Dottie Ann ran in front of me, on the leash, she stood in front of me and my wife, and stood her ground.

The Shepard kept advancing until it was just about nose to nose with Dottie Ann, I was nervous as hell but ready to act, when the dog beat me to it. Dottie Ann leaped forward, barking and snapping at the dog, the Shepard jumped back and turned. Dottie jumped again, and the Shepard took off running to join its friends. That little fifty pound ball of fire backed down a dog twice its size!
Telling you I was shocked was an understatement..I haven't seen anything like that since my late boy, Bear, backed down a Rottweiler, when he was six months old. I tell, you she really surprised me, putting herself between us and that bigger dog. That's my monkey, fifty pounds of attitude.

Well, that's it for now, but I'll be back..

Really People...Haven't we done enough?

With all the movies that Holly-weird makes, about Alien beings coming down
to wipe us out of the solar system, Zombie apocalysis's and what not. You'd think with so much worry about being wiped out as a species, Mankind would have
a bit more care for the other beings that share this big ass blue marble...
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
I read on another blogger's page, that the last Javan Rhino may have been
slaughtered for its horn...for it's horn? REALLY! Come you fuckers, have you not heard of Viagra? Is that the only way you can get the yang up?
I mean damn, get a real job. And before you say, "oh well you know in some parts, this is the only way they can feed their families..." Bullshit, ever hear of farming?
And it's not only the Poachers? Its the sick bastards that pay for it too! Medical research my ass. Since when was it necessary to wipe out an entire species? We rage out against genocides on a daily basis..Raise the red flag every time some dumb ass senator's state squirrel is in danger of losing its park, why can't we save an animal that has been around longer than we have?  Why not just say so and so's little muffin has been found to cure dumb ass-itis and let's see how fast they launch a protection order against shooting the Bischon-Frise'
I know these are other countries, and they have different cultures and such, but come on people..FOR A FREAKING HORN?
Killing and animal for food..to survive, I can understand, but to slaughter something needlessly, is stupid.
How would you like it, if someone came down and said, "hey little earth dude, on my planet, your toenails cure butt-rash..." and there we find your little dumb poacher ass,
dead, without toe's....
Would suck, wouldn't it?
Think about it.
Thanks to Wayne at the blog :My World and welcome to it for the following link:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/world/asia-pacific/vietnam-loses-fight-to-save-its-rare-javan-rhinos-after-last-animal-believed-poached-for-horn/2011/10/25/gIQAO04KEM_story.html

Guess we survived...DAMN, No zombies!

Well hell, Harold..Guess you were wrong again...Hey can't be right all the time, bubkey..well in your case, yes, you can't be right all the time.
Come on people, the man is 9,000 years old...He's Freaking Methuselah, for fucks sake! Without the freaking wisdom that age is supposed to bring..just the senility.
Wonder how many gathered for his little fireside apocalyptic chat, this time? hmm?
fuhgettaboutit!

Laters Harry...

Now on to lighter news..
Netflix owned up...800,000 people proved it..You were wrong homey.
"Split the service and they won't leave"...HA! What a maroon!
But the big cheese figures, he has the last laugh, "I'll agree to admit I was wrong", he says... but does he lower the price?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Asshole figures he wins out by keeping the service as one, streaming and DVD, but still got to raise the fees...Still lost 800,000 customers dingus!
Only reason I'm still on it is because Amazon charges you a yearly fee, and then a rental fee to stream or obtain the DVDs how fucked is that?) and Blockbuster doesn't play on a Roku box..bastards..
Still there are other alternatives, and as soon as I find one that has as big a library as Netflix...unless they get their act together, I might be 800,001.

World is ending Friday, Again...

And here we go again..Round two of Harold Camping and the Family Radio Happy hour players!
Really?
Dude...You're 90, The world is ending for your every fucking day! Deal with it!
I mean, seriously, you may have had something relevant to say, back when you didn't need to strain your food, but come on grandpa..LET IT GOOOOO!

This guy had millions of sheep, and I call you sheep, because real people who claim to read and honestly follow that book of theirs, would not follow a false profit who is blatenently in this scheme for profit!
Plain and simple, folks, its a money ploy. He did it, Roberts did it, when was claiming he was going to be "taken home, if he didn't get a Million dollars". And instead of telling his ass, "Fuck it! Laters Oral, go home!" but NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
You gave it to him..not once..BUT TWICE!
REALLY?
People, there is a word for these freaks..
CON ARTIST!

JEEZE!

Boo! Stop me if you heard this..

So, one day, long ago, ( and we're talking long here..seeing as I've already reached the
half century mark..), there was this nice old lady that used to make dresses. Well she up and died. Yeah, shame, I know. Not the point, thing is, me and my "ever-always up to anything that could get us into the most trouble" friends, had gotten it into our minds that being she had died in the home, it had to be most certainly haunted! Hey, what'd you expect, logic? We were nine.
Any who, it wasn't so much that she had passed away..wasn't so much that she had chosen our neighborhood to live out her last days...WE HAD A HAUNTED HOUSE!
Yeah buddy, we were going to be cool! Talk of the school yard.
There was only one thing..We had to get PROOF!
Say What?!
Yup..Proof was needed..Can't be cool on your say so alone, ya know. needed something from the Ghost House (as it was now known). 
Damn!
That meant one, if not all of us would have to go into that house and bring out something, to show we'd been there. Something from her room!
WHAT!?
Hey, nobody said nothing about going into the old bats dead room!
Well, nobody, but Raymond. And he was on our side! The big dumb ass.
Now all the kids wanted us to go into the house and come out with something.
See, the house still had things in it..left behind things..and it had to be done at night
WHAT!
Shit, this was getting worse all the time. Well, not wanting to be called chicken, or worse, Liars. Ruben, Alex, Gabriel, Raymond(dumb ass, this was his fault..) and Gary and Kevin., and we were going for PROOF!
and it was going to be during the day..
Hey, we were nine, ya know.
So, we find a way in..and we were scared..hell, it was dark in there, and it didn't help
with Raymond making "Oooooo" sounds..(did I mention he was a dumb ass?).
The six of us made our way through the house, to the stairs and up to the second story. Now, it was September, which in California, is still pretty damn warm. So why was it so freaking cold in that house? And it was daylight. How come it was so dark in here? And why was that dumb ass still making those damn "Oooooo" noise, dammit!
Then the wind picked up! What the hell, NOW?! Really?
So up the creaky steps we go..yeah they were creaky, finally reaching the landing, and wouldn't you know it, her room was the only one with the closed door. How did we know this, you ask?
IT HAD A BLACK WREATH ON THE DOOR!
Could ya get anymore creepier!
Don't people ever clean up after the dead, jeez!
Well there we were, standing outside the door, of the haunted room..A myriad of Spirits, Ghouls, Demons and the like were sure to be on waiting for us on the other side.
There was only one sure way to proceed....
Raymond was going first.
After all, it was his big mouth that got us here in the first place. He kept up with the "Ooooo" sounds..and there were five of us that were in agreement to his one.
Numbers..they count for something.
Pushing Raymond from the middle of the pack to the front, we egged him on to open the door..that and the stern promise that we would tell every girl we knew that he had wet his pants and never went up the stairs..and being the ladies man that he thought himself to be, he could not stand to let that happen. So he did it.
HE OPENED THE FREAKING DOOR!
The room was a mess. There were still clothes strewn about, papers, a shoe...and dumb ass was opening the door for dramatic effect. Like he would now what the hell that was..SHEESH!
So we're peering into this room, dusky light is streaming in thru the milky white curtains, when Raymond opens the door fully. Only to reveal a figure, draped in white, standing in the corner! REACHING OUT TO US!
HOLY SHIT THE FREAKING JOINT WAS HAUNTED!
It was Her, and she was coming to get us and take us back to the grave! Or so that's what Raymond was screaming, as he just about knocked the shit out of the rest of us on his way out of the room and down the stairs. The rest of us not too far behind.
As we cleared the unboarded window, we had used to get in, we scattered in different directions, mostly in part because we were scarred half out of our wits, but also because the housing authority had shown up, and none of us wanted to get caught.
Meeting up later at Alex's house, all the tales of false bravado spilling about like so much OJ. Kevin had realized that in all our excitement and rush to get the hell out of there, we forgot to grab a keepsake to prove our "bravery".
Well HELL.
Until someone says, "Guys?..I got this"...
and we turn to see Alex standing there with one single red ladies high heel shoe.
In the mad rush to get out, Alex was the last one out, but thought quick enough to grab the one thing he had fallen one.
In passing, years later, I remember my mother saying the woman was a seamstress, and being such, had dressmaker's dummies. Looking back, I could just make out that free standing dummy, wrapped in the white shift curtains, as they blew with the wind from the broken window.
But in this nine year old's imagination, it was a ghost, in a haunted house..and the six of us braved the unknown that day in September for that red trophy.
Yeah, we were heroes...just for one day.

Through the Hoops..Circle of life my a...

So, ever since that damn animated movie came out, the mouse company has
everyone thinking that the so-called "Circle of Life" is this wondrous, ever changing
thing that happens and is a glorious change..
OK, right..if you're a butterfly, maybe. I mean that Caterpillar to winged beauty is
something, but for the most part, its skinned knees, the weirdness of adolescence,
and the ever changing insanity of adulthood.
There is no "Circle".
There are a never ending series of hoops you have to jump through just to make it
in life.
Actually, I'd call it a "Square".
Go Straight..Turn left! Childhood..Turn left! Teen-ager...Turn left! Adult...Turn
left! Senior citizen..hell I'm back where I started!
Nothing smooth about that one.
The simplest of these was childhood..really. All you had to worry about was breakfast
lunch and dinner, what you were getting for your birthday and Christmas.
Simple!
Unless your parents were total dicks, or you were that angst ridden dipstick
from "The Wonder Years" , then life was a breeze.
It's when you started to sprout, that the shit hit the fan.
I know, not all of you had a crappy teen age life..but we aren't all perfect teens living
in Small-ville..Shit happens, and you deal. Well at least I dealt.
Adulthood has not been all that rosy either. Relationships, family, friends..its all
a pain at times.. You work hard to maintain them all..and hope to freaking hell
you got it right!
Jobs..please, don't get me started. Can you say "Clicks?"
It's like high school all over again...Complete with the "in-crowds"
OY!
I'm kinda waiting to turn left again...waiting to see whats down that road...
What hoop I'll have to jump through next?

Peace.

Night Owls and Wayward Pooches

So, there I was, driving home from work last night. Remembered that I had to drop off my DVD rental in the post box. I pull into the Post Office driveway, no one around, I mean who's going to be there, its almost 1:30 in the freaking morning, right..well I'm there, but that's just me, and I have a bad habit of putting things off til the last minute because I procrastinate. Then again, that's just me..

Whatever..
Back to the subject. So, my Post Office has this wrap around driveway that leads to the drop off post boxes, pull right up and dump off your mail without getting out of the car. Talk about convenience. Well I pull up to the post box, and I'm ready to send off my Netflix DVD (that's something for another day..ugh!) and sitting right there on the box is this Owl! I almost hit the damn thing! It was just chilling out enjoying the night air, no bigger than a pigeon. Scared the bejuzzus out of me..HA HA! Really, who expects to see wildlife sitting on the post box?
Since moving to Arizona, I've come in contact with nature many times..I've had a Road Runner race my car. Seen a Coyote in the cotton fields across from my housing area.
Saw four Vultures light in the fields across the way from the airport down the way from my home. Been buzzed by a Hawk while walking my dog ( she was none too happy about that, I'll have you know..). Been visited by lizards more times than I can count
and one night something, don't know what the hell it was, but it was big, flew from the top of my air conditioning unit and off into the night! Still trying to figure what that was.
Have yet to have a run in with the standard denizens, Scorpions and snakes..though the exterminator did find a very large and, to use his words, "ballsy" Wolf spider, in my back yard when he came out to spray..said he actually had to kill it the old fashioned way...he stepped on it! Hey whatever works.
I mean last night after the Owl run in, I also ran into two stray Pit bulls..who looked so lost, no collars, and were not the vicious, snarling brutes the media likes to portray them as, they were just two lost puppies..who got out of their back yard..
I stopped the truck, rolled down the window, and said "Go home babies..what are you doing out? go on, go home"..
They sat there next to my door, looking at me as if to say, "oh, OK..sorry, just out taking the night air..bye". and off they went..
I did the responsible thing and contacted the authorities. I mean last thing I needed to hear was that two dogs got shot because someone woke and freaked out because he saw them when he was going out to his car..ya know? I wouldn't be able to look my Dottie Ann in the face if that happened..and in Goodyear, the Animal control will not come out late at night..Sissy's.
So that's the AZ..strange, wondrous, and in all its wild glory..yeah, I know..but hey, what do you want..
Peace.

Hi folks..Me again. Changed the digs, ya know, slapped on a coat of paint. New carpet, blinds, the whole nine yards. How do ya like it? Dottie thinks its nice..likes the view.
Well not a whole hell of a lot to talk about today. Guy I share a desk with can't seem to remember to log off the freaking computer when he leaves at the end of the day. Nothing like coming into work, sitting down and finding that you have to shut the damn thing down just to start up..peachy.
laters

Life in changing perspectives

...

I have come to a conclusion, and OK, may not be original but it is to me, that life happens. My life, your life, everyones freaking life..(yeah, folks, I'm going to try and get through this one with minimal cussing, so shut the fuck up and pay attention..). You see, I had what I guess you could call an Epiphany. I figured, that I was tired. Tired of being angry. Tired of being angry at myself, tired of being angry at things I had no control over.
Just damn tired.
I mean Shit happens! In life, at work, at home..
So I decided to do what a new friend of mine told me I should be doing a lot more of...Smiling. I decided to smile more. and laugh. and just say "Fuck it" (OK I know I said I wasn't going to cuss so much..but then again, its my damn blog, and it wouldn't be me, if I didn't..so there, n'yah!)..

As I was saying, there are just too many things in this world that you can't change. too many assholes that try to ruin your day, I know, I deal with a lot of them, daily! And if you let them rain on your parade, the only thing that's going to happen, is you're going to go thru life soaked.
My Wife and I have patched things up, we are working on things, and no it's not perfect, but what the hell in life is? There are ups and downs, period. So we deal. 'Nuff said.
At work, well, what do you want it's work. you a have shit day,  you deal with it  and you move on. Now I'm putting in for a promotion, a new position..If I get it, cool beans, means more work, but hey, its off the grind of dealing with the public, so YEAH ME! If I don't well, Fuck it, life goes on.
Do I piss and moan?  Maybe, I'm human, but I'm not going to let it hold me back, can't. Like I said, Shit happens.
Cross that bridge and all..
Life is what you make of it. Step of the curb, get hit by a bus. In the same respect, walk into the market, win the lotto! It's a crap shoot. You smile and move on.
So here's to smiling and moving on..with life, with work, with everything...

Peace.

OK, So I've been a little behind..

So..how's everyone doing..yeah I'm back...been away, but always around.
Still working on the story. Need to finish that thing, (Gods I need to finish that thing!)
So what have I been up to??? Like people care. I mean, those that read my blog, have blocked me from theirs, and those that used to come around and visit often, said
"Well, he's not here anymore so who cares".

Well, in all actuality, I care. I really do, or else I wouldn't be here now.  So tell you what, to anyone who takes the time to peruse my blog, I will make the concentrated to write something remotely interesting.
So welcome back to me..I'm not going to begin to get into where I've been..but I'm back, and that's all that counts.

Peace,

AND SO IT GOES....
Facebook, I have ended my relationship with you..why? Well, for starters, you have allowed, not once, not twice, but on three, THREE! different occasions, the hacking of my email accounts from your so-called "secure" site.
Not only did I receive spam, but my wife, my friends and co-workers, received embarrassing spam, that was being sent out via an email address that I had closed some time earlier this year, and yes, maybe looking back I should have had the foresight to go in and remove that address from my FB account, but I didn't, and wham! It not only gets hacked, it gets used as a proxy account for every Tom, Dickhead and Lame-O that has nothing better to do than lambaste people with useless crap.

If this was one time, I could see saying, "hey, it happens..screw it", and move on..But no, this is the third time..Damn people, do you not see what is going on?
Every one I have spoken to, has left FB for the same damn reason. Hello, can you say MYSPACE?
I don't care who the hell runs it, the dumb bastard doesn't care about the people using it, if he did, he would put more money into the security, instead of worrying about how much he can make off  "Single women in Phoenix who are waiting for your call" and the like..But I guess the adverts pay the bills..or more like, line his pockets.

Asta FB..it's been real, and for a time, it was real fun..
Emphasis on the WAS.

Whats up in the Work place???

Happy Employees Are Critical For An Organization's Success, Study Shows
Science Daily (Feb. 4, 2009) — "One's happiness might seem like a personal subject, but a Kansas State University researcher says employers should be concerned about the well-being of their employees because it could be the underlying factor to success."

This was the opening to an article in Science Daily...now in reading this and taking note of all the crap that goes on in the workplace, you'd think that more and more employers would take a bit of heed from such learned words, no?

No..they really don't. How many times have you started a job, see the place to be a really great place to work, only to reach the point of total disillusionment by your third year in?

Hell, some people don't even take that long, I've seen new employee's come in and within six months time, they are already feeling what I'm feeling now...No, not burn out, I've been in this game too damn long for that, would have burned out a long time ago, no, I'm talking about frustration.

When you're told that "This job promotes solely on your merit's, and the noticeable work that you do"...and that you have to be in your position for six months before you can promote up, then you see some guy not even four months out of training get promoted and when you ask what gives, the answer you get is a stock "Well, he showed really good improvement on his scores.." Yeah..BULLSHIT! I don't care if he was the fucking Dali-lama's brother in law, in the workplace, what applies to one grunt, applies to all! The Real reason, two supervisor's on the floor, were buddies of his..end of story.

Favoritism...Gotta love it. The Cliquish behavior of the High School mentality lives on in the work place folks..Think that's gonna make your employees happy?

DON'T FUCKING THINK SO!

If I lose out to someone, I would like to think that it was because they had the better skills...but when I have been doing a job for three years, and have 25 years of experience to back my play, and I lose a promotion to someone who kissed up to some dinkus' ego, OH HELL NO!

Oh and here's the topper, OK, Person A, goes around extolling the virtues of this new department that is opening up, spends her time, running around "RAH RAH, this is going to be a great thing, you should join, blah blah" tries to get people over to this team...Here's the kicker, she's only "recruiting" newbies...at the behest of the person that is to be the supervisor of this new team, why? One could only guess it's something to do with all the "fresh start" idea crap they have going...but if that is so, why put out all the emails regarding this new team, and the "you have the chance to be in on the GROUND FLOOR" jazz?..Then when it comes time for the interviews for these positions, alot of the people that applied for it, I knew, had worked or been working for the company for sometime, some as long as two and a half, three years..figured, they knew the product, should be a shoe in, right?

WRONG.

Turns out, person that was going to be running this show, already had her peeps picked out, the interview's were a dog and pony show...Ms.Rah-Rah, was one, the rest were mostly from the Supe's previous team, and the others were newbies...fresh from training.

Yeah, talking about people feeling screwed over..

oh, did I apply, you ask? no..why? because I've been in the sales game before, and I don't feel like going thru that again...but like I said, I know people that did, and it was pretty unfair.

And ever since, now all we do is clean up after this team..Oh and Ms.Rah-Rah? She moved on to another team...apparently the sales game wasn't all it was cracked up to be...Stimulating, isn't it...

See, when your employees are made to feel like second class citizens, and not like valued members of the machine, then the machine is going to break down..Yeah, you can always go out and hire new ones, but all that time you
take to train new employees, when you have knowledge and expertise there, waiting to be utilised, just stagnating because you can't figure out a productive way to put that talent to good use, well, that's just too damn bad for you...and the company..and the employees...

And that's when the machine breaks down.

What are we left with then?

Spare parts and broken hearts.

A little give on both parts, the employer, and the employee can keep the machine rolling along smoothly. Not saying you have to kiss each other's ass, not saying you have to give into "The Man", just saying all we have to do is cooperate with each other, respect each other, get rid of the "Us Vs. Them" mentality, send that clique mentality back where it belongs...High School...and get back to what everyone wants, a happy and safe place to work.


Peace people..

Just a quick note...

I know I have stated this before..but now is the time. I am finishing the story that I have been working on. Real life has been in the way..biggest idea blocker there is, but a very good friend of mine reminded me to just do it...its what you want to do, so do it! And that's just what I'm going to do...My promise to her, to myself..to anyone who has ever known that all I have ever wanted to do was write...It's story time.

and it begins with the completion of Martha Grim.

Thanks Mrs. Hilpp.. You are a very good friend... :-)

Driftwood..

You ever wonder why, certain people make impressions in your life?
Like seeing them every day just makes the day a bit more bearable.
Their smile, demeanor, basic outlook on things can turn your whole day around..
then one day they out of your life...and you feel lost. Like you're just drifting.
Drifting through life..drifting through work..
I'm tired of drifting.
I've drifted though my life, drifted through my job, my marriage
my friendships, I'm just drifting on an endless current that seems to have no
landing in sight.
Unless I put my feet down, and stand.
After forty nine years on this fucking marble, is it too late to stop drifting
through life
like the wood you find at the beach?
Hell, even that they polish up, slap on a coat of varnish and call it art.
Why can't I choose the time to look at my life and polish it up, stop the drifting and do what's in my heart..
I'm tired of watching people go..watching life pass.
While I sit on the side of the road.
I know people leave, move on, do what's right for them, and I applaud them for that
and hold not one ounce of regret...
or anger...but there is loss.
I can't help that. I feel a deep sense of loss. but I'll get over it, and I'll move on, because at the same time I'm happy for them, because they are doing what's best for themselves. As so should I.
I need to fix things in my life.
I don't know how, just that I do.
I don't want to be driftwood anymore...I want to be settled on the
the shore.

I know, I'm supposed to be finishing my story, but right now, I don't feel like writing about that...I'll finish it shortly..tonight..if you'd had told me this morning, ok, technically yesterday, that I was going to be killing my dog, I would have hit you in the face...more like beat the shit out of you...Who'da thunk it?

My boy...my little bear...He was a good dog..he never bit or jumped at anyone...he was a good boy....And that fucking desease..that goddamned thing that took my first boy, did it again..it came for him. It took my Bear.

He started feeling bad this weekend..guess he was feeling bad for a while, but dogs can't say what's bothering them, can they. We kinda figured the was getting tired of the food that he'd been eating for nine years, mostly due to a stomach condition when he was a puppy, he decided he didn't want to eat. So we made him some rice, which he ate...he vomited a few times, and then after the weekend and a food change, he was fine..he was eating, and when I left for work yesterday afternoon, he was fine, seemed to be his old self. Then, two hours into my shift, I get a call from my wife, she's crying, hysterical, Bear's having a seizure, he's barely breathing, she doesn't know what to do..I have to leave work...I come home, calling the vet on the way, they say take him in, I'm talking to my wife on the other line, she's outside, trying to keep Dotty Ann, our other dog, calm..Bear is up but just staring...she's scared, Dotties scared..I'm in traffic...
I get home, my wife and dottie are in the bedroom, Bear comes in from out back, walks up, on shakey legs..but he knows me...I take him to the ER Vet..and thats when they drop the bomb on me..

His blood oxygen is 77 percent. His Spleen is distended to the point of rupturing, and there is a mass on it. Bigger than the spleen.
Taking into regard his age, and his blood oxygen levels which were dropping, and that the spleen had to be removed..and for dogs not the same as humans..we were basically told that he would not be the same afterwards, and would have maybe a year, if that..and we don't have the 16,000 for the surgery....So what do we do?

I said goodbye to my boy...my bear, who I raised from a puppy...my bear, who say 8 christmas's with me...eight Thanksgivings, eight Halloweens, eight 4th of july's that I stayed up most of the night with...and eight birthdays, where he got his cookie, and I got a thank you lick on the face...Bear who always met me at the door, no matter how late I got home from work...Bear, who learned to sleep in a box, while house breaking, which turned into a two bedroom apt, then a three bedroom townhome, and then a four bedromm condo...long story.
Bear, he was a good dog..and if I made any mispellings or errors in this its becuase of the tears in my eyes, and you know what, i don't give a fuck...cause bear loved me just the way i am...and I'll allways remember that..and love him for that..


Bear..September 23, 2000/October 13, 2009

Sorry for the delay..work ya know..real life can be such a pain sometimes..But now over the next few nights we will come to the conclusion of The Secret Garden of Martha Grim...

To quote a "Beyond Thunderdome" "Lady's and Gentlemen, Boy's and Girl's....Dying Time is here...!"

Enjoy the ride...


Thanks for reading...

The Secret Garden of Martha Grim
By Richard A. Lopez
(c) 1992
Page 28

After leaving Tommy in the other room, Willie made his way through the beaded curtain, and into the adjoining parlor, as directed. Still wary and watchful for anything that looked like a trick. He could hear Ann banging on the door for a bit, then it suddenly stopped. That set off all sorts of warning buzzers in his head. Ann was not the type to give up on anything. Hell, he figured when he saw her in the garage, she was probably looking for something to put in his food, or something like that. He wouldn't put it past her. No, something had to have happened to her.
Just as he was turning towards the beaded curtain, a rustling drew his attention back to the room. This time he paid attention to the room he was in. There was a large, circular couch in the center, and four huge vases, about five maybe six feet tall in each corner with the oddest looking plant he'd ever seen overflowing from them. Outside of the couch and the vases, the room was devoid of furniture. Was a window opened? Where did the rustling come from? Maybe she had mice? Could be, the place was full plants and vines and crap, stands to reason there'd be mice. Willie could see no sign of mice, or any home pest. The home was immaculate. But something was off. Something
was wrong, he could just feel it.

Before he could check the room out further, there was a sound of to his left, over his shoulder, which caused him to turn, and suddenly, there she was, standing by a door that wasn't there when he first came into the room. For a moment he was taken aback by her presence.
She seemed to be floating there, in a gown of white silk with green printed flowers, that flowed in the same phantom breeze that seemed to cause the rustling sound, just minutes before. Until this moment he had never really looked at Martha Grim. Never really studied her as close as he was to her now, in this light...She was exquisite. Her skin was flawless. It looked as smooth as marble, but there was something off about it. Something not quite right. It was too perfect. She was too perfect. Willie was getting that itchy feeling that he always got when something was going to go wrong, and every bit of his gut was telling him to screw this deal and bolt. Then she spoke.

"Mr. Cole, I'm sorry to have kept you waiting. There was just something I had to attend to in the basement." her voice was odd, there was
a sing-song quality to it that almost lulled you off guard. "So what is it that brings you here today, Mr.Cole? Aside from the small package in the adjoining room." a small, sly smile crossed her lips as the last words were spoken.

Willie finally found words
"Well lookie here, if it ain't the queen of death herself," he said, trying to put on his best tough guy persona, "Cut the act lady, I know what you got down in the basement, and as far as I'm concerned you can keep her too. You know damn well what I'm here for. I want that damn secret you have growing and keeping these damn grounds green. It's either a seed, or a feed a fertilizer, something, but damn it lady, I want that secret, or I'm telling everyone what you've done!" His voice was almost cracking..His false bravado wavering.
She noticed this, and was on it like a shark that had just scented blood...

"Please Mr.Cole, spare me the dramatics, your machismo is as transparent as the beads of sweat forming on your brow." She moved into the room, almost like she was floating.

Willie took a step back, without thinking, then reached for the gun in his waistband, "You can just stop right there, lady.." he said, finding his voice, "We ain't dancing partners, and I ain't here looking to hook up
so just cool your jets. I know you got something sinister going on here. I know it, My dad knew it, and I'm pretty damn sure Quinn knew it, and that's what got him killed!"

Martha stopped her advance, eyeing him warily.

Ah..Willie thought, that hit a nerve. His confidence renewed, he continued on, hoping to scare or trick her into revealing more of the gardens secrets.
"So, it's true. Quinn is dead. I knew it. I knew he was, and I knew you had something to do with it. That look in your eye just told me. You know what else it tells me lady, it tells me that you're going to give me whatever the hell I want." He emphasised the last point by producing the gun from his waistband.

Martha didn't even blink. She just gazed from the gun, to Willie, and to what he thought was the door to the other room. Willie caught that, and was quick to misjudge. "Don't bother," he said, waving the gun in the direction he thought she was looking, "You may be slim and quick, but you can't outrun a bullet. And yeah, I'll take the kid out, too.."

Then she did a strange thing. She smiled.

Not just a grin, but a wide, toothy smile, like a shark, or that cat he always heard of that ate that damn bird..and it froze his soul.

"Mr.Cole, I don't know if you are a bigger fool for coming here, or for thinking YOU could actually harm me."
She started to laugh..Why the hell was she laughing..Stop laughing..

"You think this is a game?" Cole was getting incensed, "Listen lady, I'm not playing I will use this thing!" waving the gun, but she just laughed more.
So to emphasize the seriousness of his intent, Willie fired a round off into the corner of the room, hitting a vase on a shelf. The vase and its contents spilling out in a gooey mass onto the floor.
Suddenly, the laughter was replaced by an ear splitting scream that seamed to shake the entire house.
Willie almost dropped the gun, when he covered his ears. Almost.

Martha ran to the corner, dropping to her knees, she cradled the plant like an injured child or pet that had just been hit by a car.
When he recovered, Willie felt like hit. looking for her, he saw her in the corner cooing to the damned thing.
"Dammit lady!" he yelled, "it's just a fucking plant! Now get the fuck up!"
She wasn't moving, she was just cooing to that damn plant. He was getting angrier, "Damn lady, don't you understand, I'm not kidding here, get up or I'm going to..."
She wheeled on him like a cobra, her face contorted in anger, eyes black and filled with tears. "You're going to what, Mr. Cole?" her look stopped him in mid step. "What are you going to do? Shoot me? With what?"
Here eyes darted to the gun.
Just as quickly, Willie heard , more then felt the gun fall to the floor. Looking down, he saw the reason why. The gun never left his hand. It was still in its grip. The hand was just no longer part of his arm.

Warmth splashed down his leg. Followed by a sharp pain as the nerve endings were exposed to the air.
The reality of it all had not hit him. He just stared as the blood spilled down his leg, from his severed wrist.
His mind screamed. His heart pounded. Then he felt himself grabbed about the waist and legs. His other arm taken by what he thought at first were giant snakes. One of the "snakes" grabbed his right wrist and squeezed it tightly. Tight enough to stop the blood flow and break him from his trance.
He was lifted from the floor. What he thought were snakes were in fact vines, and they seemed to come from everywhere. They held him aloft, squeezing the breath from him so he could not scream. He struggled in vain to get free, but the vines just held him tighter, until something slapped his right wrist, brushing the raw nerves. Willie tried to scream, but what came out was a whimper.

"Bring him here, my children." he could hear her say, who was she talking to? The plants. This was insane. These are plants, this doesn't happen!
"Hold him, Here!" She pointed to a spot in front of her, where she stood holding that damn plant.
"So you idiot, you wanted to know the secret to my plants," she said, he could hear the venom in her voice as she spat the words at him,
"You, who would be a king among the animals, are nothing but fodder! You want to know the "Secret"? You had it in you all along. And you brought it to me so willingly. You truly are a fool. You will feed them. give them that which sustains your worthless hide. Then your carcass will become the fertilizer that will keep them forever green. THAT is the secret you soulless slug." With the last word, she slapped him across the face, drawing blood.

She turned away, still holding the plant that she picked up off the floor, "come child, lets find another spot for you. Walking away, she spoke to the vines, "Place him on the mantle, and take your time draining him..I don't want a drop left in his worthless carcass."
Willie screamed, as he was lifted from the floor and slammed to wall above the mantle. He struggled to turn his head, and could see the vines creeping up towards him, slithering out of the big dark vases in the corners of the room. As they reached him, he could see thorns break from their tips, and like small hypodermic syringes, jab greedily into the exposed flesh of his arms, through his pant-legs, and even his shoes!
And before the sight was stabbed out from his eyes, he could see out to the corner window, a window he didn't notice before from the floor because it was behind a free standing room divider. It was a small window that looked out onto an enclosed patio that was filled with smaller vases like the larger ones in here. They held yellow and red flowers with green tendrills that seem to stretch out to one central point.
The body of Sheriff Quinn.

The Secret Garden of Martha Grim
By Richard A. Lopez
(c) 1992
Page 27



Willie pulled his truck right up to the front steps of Martha's house, and turned off the engine. Before getting out, he took the .45 caliber pistol out of its velvet bag, checked the clip and racked a bullet into the chamber. Getting out of the truck, he tucked the gun into his waistband, pulling his shirt over it to hide it from view.
Walking over to the passenger side, he opened the door and lifted Tommy out. Wasting no time, he walked up the porch steps and to the front door. Before he could knock on the exterior screen door, a tinny voice came over a small exterior speaker..
"Come in Mr. Cole, you don't have to stand on ceremony. Place the boy in the room to your left, and then proceed to the parlor. It is the the very next room through the curtains."
The speaker clicked off, and a buzzer sounded, undoing the latch and opening the front door.
Willie, ever the cautious one, opening the outer door, he pushed the front door open with the toe of his boot, holding Tommy over his shoulder with one hand, his other staying very close to the gun in his waistband, and looked inside.
The house was dimly lit if barely that. Willie stepped inside, and carried Tommy to the room off to the left as instructed by the houses owner. The screen door closed behind him with barely an audible click. The front door closing just as Ann reached the front porch.

Running up the steps, she banged on the screen door just as it closed. Pulling on the handle, she screamed at Willie to open the door, to bring back Tommy. The latch held, and her only answer was the wind rustling the vines on the porch. She stepped back, looking for something to use to help break through the door, a brick, a chair, anything. The porch was devoid of anything that could be used as a tool or weapon, just those damned vines. She ran down to Willie's truck, quickly looked in the back where his tools were, he had to have an axe, or a pick, something, anything, to use on the door, the window. There, in the bed of the truck was machete. Grabbing it she ran up the steps, ready to rip open the screen door, when a voice came through over the small speaker just to the left of the door,stopping her in her tracks.

"Now, now Mrs.Hawkins, we can't have you doing that, now can we?" the tinny voice, almost melodic, spoke to Ann.

"I want my son you bitch!" Ann shouted, not caring if she was heard or not.

" Stand back and I'll open the door," came the voice, "Harm my house, and you will not see your son, let alone live to see out the day."
the melody was replaced my menace.

Ann took two steps back, and waited for the door to open, still clutching the machete in her right hand. She heard a buzzer, and then a loud "Click!" and a the door opened, or so she thought. It was just the wrong door. Suddenly the whole world seemed to slide away, and she was falling through space. The porch opened and swallowed her, sending her down to the basement below the Grim house.
She landed on several bags that were stacked in the corner, underneath, and tumbled to the floor. The machete banged of her leg and across the floor. She came to rest against the side wall, unconscious.

A door opened at the top of the stairs about twenty feet above her. Martha Grim looked down at the latest unwelcome arrival to her home, and smiled. "You'll be with your son, soon enough Mrs. Hawkins. Soon enough" She stepped back out of the room, leaving the door
slightly ajar..

The Secret Garden of Martha Grim
by Richard A. Lopez
(c) 1992
Page 26

Driving back to neighborhood, all four of them in John's car, they were still discussing what to do when the came face to face with Willie.
"What if Ann is there?" Callie asked..

"Why didn't we call the police again?" Carmine kept asking..

"OK, so we find him at the house, what do we do, just beat the shit out of him, and take your kid? And your wife is gonna be OK with that?"
Rudy asked, more sarcastic than anything..

"I don't care about her, for all I know she's part of this," came John's reply, a bit too sharply..."Look, I just want to get my boy out of there. I can't really ask you all to do anything that you are against doing, and I thank you for helping me this much, but Cole's got my son, and if he's hurt him, I'll kill the son of bitch!" John finished as he whipped the car around a slow moving Honda that was in front of them..

Everyone held on, tightly. Carmine made a remark about slowing down, and Rudy had said something about being in one accident today already, but it was Callie, who brought him around to reality when she touched his shoulder lightly and said, "John, Tommy..."
John slowed down to safer speed.
Tommy, he thought, hold on..I'm coming...daddy's coming..
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ann reached the gates just as they closed, just in time to see Willie's truck drive up to the large, vine covered Victorian home that was the
Grim house.
She held the iron bars of the closed gate in a death grip, screaming his name, as he disappeared from sight behind an overly large tree with a gnarled bark.
"My God," she thought, "He's taking Tommy to her, but why? What could she want with Tommy?" Then as if answering her own question, she thought of Sheriff Quinn!
Willie was always talking about how he thought that Martha had something to do with the Sheriff's disappearance. She thought he was just talking. What if he was right. What if she was some kind of killer and he was going to trade Tommy for that so-called "secret" she had.
But he also had the gun.
What if he was going to trick her, and use the gun instead? Was he crazy enough to do this? What if Tommy got caught in the middle?
Who was she kidding, she didn't care so much as she did that if John found out that Willie had put Tommy in harms way, he would hold her solely responsible. And that meant she would go to jail.
That was something she couldn't handle. She had to get Tommy out of there, now!
Ann started to climb. The gate had wicked looking spear points on the top, god she didn't want to get hung up on those.
Suddenly, the buzzer sounded and the gates started to open. She held on for a bit, then let go, once she was sure that she was inside the property. Moving away from the gate and its wicked looking points, she started slowly first, but faster, up the walk.
Not noticing how the vines had closed in behind her, completely covering the walk and pathway, slowly creeping up the way and closing the gap. Silently herding her towards the house.